The Clap Out

Today I got an email from my son's 5th grade teacher. This is the last week of school for 5th grade. Lots of activities going on. Pool Party tomorrow, Clap Out on Thursday & 5th grade Promotion Ceremony on Friday.

I'm glad she explained what the Clap Out was because I was clueless. "The Clap Out will take place at 3pm after our promotion practice. The students run a trail on the field while all the other students clap for them. It's very fun and a great picture opportunity if you are able to make it! :)"

Oh, I get it! Cool! Then I burst into tears at my desk. And shit, here they come again. I don't think it's just this event that is getting to me but the overall realization that my son is graduating from 5th grade. I remember walking him to the bus stop for his first day of Kindergarten. We bought him a Buzz Lightyear Backpack and matching lunchbox. He was so little, full of excitement and ready to say goodbye to me for his first day of school. He made me promise I wouldn't cry and I didn't. But damn, I wanted too so bad. I was brave. Right now, not so much...

On Friday I will celebrate with all the other parents I have become friends with as we watch our children leave Elementary school and enter Middle School. I'm happy, I really am. It's another milestone and I'm incredibly proud of my son. I can't help but look back and reflect on the past 6 years. I'm grateful that I have been able to chaperone field trips, organize classroom parties and attend special events at the school. I'm grateful that my son has always been a good kid. Nice, polite, funny, a leader amongst his friends and smart! I'm honored that I was chosen to be his mom!

And I cry, because deep down inside, I don't want my son to grow up and leave me.