For Rent

In the time that has passed since I wrote this I've moved on. I'm over "my" house. I know there are bigger and better homes out there. Homes where the sump pump won't fail twice and spew poop all over your basement. Homes where the toilets won't clog all the time, the drains won't need to be snaked and the carpenter ants don't settle in come Spring. I realize home ownership comes with problems. I've looked back over the years that we lived in that house and had a revelation. It was costly! It had more than average problems. I'm done. I'm over it.

What I'm still having trouble with is "The Court". The Court is what we called my neighborhood. My best friend lives in The Court. My kids best friends live in The Court. The Court has parties and bbq's and neighbors that have become family.

The kids and I still hang out in The Court. The kids play while the grown-ups partake in grown-up activities. We are there everyday. And then we have to drive home. I hate that part. I miss walking a few doors down and being home.

When we went to Texas at the end of March, a recently renovated townhouse came up for rent. It was the right price AND in The Court. We put our application in but we weren't chosen. The young couple that moved in are special nice. The wife knew who I was. If I remember correctly she said something like, "I know you applied to rent this house. Sorry you didn't get it. We love it here and are so happy. So there!"

This past weekend, the house next door to my old house was available for rent. I was beyond excited because this was my last opportunity to move back into The Court. I met with the owners and they showed me the property. They said they were listing the house for $1,700/month. I tried to act cool but I'm sure my mouth gaped open a bit as my eyebrows headed north.

$1,700/month is out of our price range. Throw in Gas, Electric, Water, Internet/TV and it's about $2K/month. That's a mortgage payment! I tried to negotiate. They didn't budge. They need at least $1,700 to cover their mortgage on the property.

Today I noticed the For Rent sign in the yard. I was crushed. This was my last opportunity to move back. Now someone else is going to rent the house. The Court will continue to have parties and cook-outs. The kids will play outside while the adults chit-chat. I'll be there but as always have to leave.

I guess what I'm trying to convey in this long winded post is that once again, I'll be replaced. The reality is that  my time has passed. It has come and gone. There is a visitor badge bearing my name for The Court.

The question I need to ask myself is why am I fighting so hard to be somewhere I'm not meant to be?